Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Teacher's Blues

Today was a real rough day. 

Today felt like a suicide battle with the kids and I'm not kidding. I lost my patience despite my tremendous effort in keeping myself calm. The kids were running everywhere and anywhere like they do not recognize that there's a teacher in front of them. They were even playing during the practice when it was time to listen and behave. Their lines were not straight. They were really busy talking. I was brimming with frustration today. I swear I would've muttered (mild) profane language-- but thank goodness I was able to hold myself back. 

It's so frustrating to have finally found the correct classroom management and lose it the moment you realize you were already doing good! I really do my best everyday to handle my kids. I always search for good strategies in keeping them interested, manageable and disciplined. Oh how I wish I could be the best in classroom management. I wish I could be the best teacher I can be.

I know I can. I know achieve it--- but today just feels like I'm really far from my goal. 

We usually coin this as, "na-imbyerna."

It's okay. I still am positive that I can handle my kids tomorrow and the days after. I know they have the potential to be good and disciplined students. I know I also have the potential to be a good teacher. Today just was not the day for that.

This post is not about me, complaining and whining about my day. This is about how I feel and how I take it. Everyday is a challenge and I won't give up. I know I'll be better. I just need to be patient with my kids and most especially with myself. Take it easy. Forgive yourself. Just do better.

It made me realize.. that all those material wishlist I wanted for Christmas do not mean a thing when my kids are not performing well in school. How I wish I have a student who can actually read and understand this post. XD *sigh*

Yes, today-- I'm feeling the teacher's blue.




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